So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
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