i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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