How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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