i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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