Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Randomize