Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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