How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
