the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
You can't just leave with hair like that
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Randomize
