we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
