This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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