Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
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