I'd wear matching sweaters with you
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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