I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.�
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
