Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Randomize
