it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
