I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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