id be glad to
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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