doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
