just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
