After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
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