The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
the day after is always just damage control
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
