Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
