I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
bring money and cleavage
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
