I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
