I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
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