Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
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