scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
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