dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
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