The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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