I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Randomize
