What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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