Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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