She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
You have to summon your inner elephant
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
