Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
