Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
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