sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize