If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
