I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
