Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Randomize
