So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
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