Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
We had to coat check the pizza.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Randomize
