This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize
