Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Who did Billy Mays play for?
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Randomize
