Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
The ass gains better be worth it
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