OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Randomize
