hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Need sex. Gaining weight.
he puts the penis in happiness.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
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