I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
Soap is not a condiment
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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