no. you can't hotbox the world.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
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