no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
