Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
