Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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